Old Farts Young Tarts Review

Score 85.0 /100
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About Our Ratings

Intro promises

“Young old porn.”

First impression

Like most people, I am deathly afraid of growing old — I agree with Neil Young when he says “it’s better to burn out than to fade away.” Look, I don’t want to spend my golden years listening to Paul Harvey and wishing I could still get it up! So it’s with great joy that I introduce y’all to a little site called Old Farts Young Tarts, which lets members of the so-called Greatest Generation show young strumpets that there’s life after forty (and fifty! And sixty! And even seventy!). You see, the Viagra-poppin’ elderly men of Old Farts Young Tarts go medieval on the asses of girls who are young enough to be their granddaughters and thus this site gives us all hope that old age might not be so bad after all.

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Our opinion

I gotta say, Old Farts Young Tarts is the best designed porn site I have ever seen — the graphics on the main page alone are amusing enough to warrant a trip to this site. Seriously, the webmasters of Old Farts Young Tarts really outdid themselves when they were designing this site, which not only looks good but is also a piece of cake to navigate. The main members area is broken up into two basic parts: video updates and photo updates. Old Farts Young Tarts appears to be updated a few times a month with new videos (the photo updates aren’t date stamped, so I have no idea how often new pics are added to the site).

Currently, there are sixty-eight videos on Old Farts Young Tarts. Each video is broken up into three or more clips that come in three sizes: low, high and full-screen. You will need Windows Media Player to watch the clips, which will very slowly download onto your hard drive (even the low-resolution clips take forever to download). Your patience will be rewarded with high resolution videos that are shot well and leave absolutely nothing (and I mean nothing!) to the imagination. Full movies are about thirty-two minutes in length.

There are one hundred and thirty photo galleries on Old Farts Young Tarts at the present time. Each photo gallery contains anywhere between twenty-five pics to ninety-nine pics. The pics are absolutely gigantic and startlingly clear — the photos are so clear, in fact, that you can see every detail of the girls’ bodies (yes, even pimples and other blemishes!). Most of the photos appear to be have been shot during the video shoots for the site, but there’s also a couple bonus sets that don’t have anything to do with any of the videos.

I’m guessing Old Farts Young Tarts must be made in Europe — only in Europe would girls this young be willing to fuck men so old and ugly. And, let’s face it, these old buzzards are plenty ugly. Honestly, though, many of the girls on Old Farts Young Tarts aren’t much to look at either — some of these chicks are downright homely, almost as homely as my last two steady girlfriends!

I must warn you, dear reader, that the action on Old Farts Young Tarts is rather graphic — girls toss the salads of elderly men and piss into glass bowls. After looking at Old Farts Young Tarts, I now understand the meaning of the term “dirty old man.” In other words, Old Farts Young Tarts is not for sensitive people or folks with weak hearts.

Members of Old Farts Young Tarts also get access to Seventeen Live, where members have “the unique opportunity” to chat live with teen models “in high quality streams and sound.” Seventeen Live has a special V.I.P. section where members can go one-on-one with their favorite girls and move the cam themselves to zoom in and out, allowing members the chance to be in total control; this V.I.P. section can be accessed on a pay-per-view basis. Along with the chat rooms there are extensive photo galleries, movies, strip show clips/interviews with the girls and a schedule which tells members when girls will be online.

Conclusion

Time is marching on and each day brings us closer to the grave, which yawns in anticipation of being fed with our fetid corpses. Still, a site like Old Farts Young Tarts reminds us all that having one foot in the grave and another one on a banana peel might not be so bad, especially if you’re in-between the thighs of some young skank at the same time. Old Farts Young Tarts is a filthy little site that proves once and for all that you can teach an old dog new tricks! Hey, maybe Neil Young was wrong and fading away isn’t such a bad thing after all…

Samples

Screenshots from Old Farts Young Tarts

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