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Ass Parade review

Summary: Baby got back! Butts, booties, asses. You get to see all varieties of the female backside here. They are all worshipped on Ass Parade. A must see for buttmen.

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Ass Parade Picture screenshot
Score 85.0 /100
About Our Ratings
J., 2006-02-09

Butts, Hardcore, Reality, Videos, Movies, Mega-Sites


Intro promises

- The finest all amateur bubble butts on the web!
- 100% original, fully downloadable content
- Access to 12 exclusive sites

First impression

Well, the tour pages are full of thumbnails and those thumbnails are filled to the edges with big asses, so it looks like this one's gonna be pretty on-topic. The layout is pretty picture-heavy, but there are certainly worse things to be. Might be a little slow on the load-up if you're still rockin' the 56k baud, but things look to be of quality here, despite the descriptions which appear to have been written by fraternity pledges looking to impress their "brah"s.


Credit Card, Online Check ($1.00 surcharge)

3 day trial: $4.95
One month: $23.95

Our opinion

Upon entering the site, you're greeting with, voila, another huge ass in your face. Below that is a navigation bar for the site and then a very long list of movie updates, each with a thumbnail and extensive description which usually contains, in some fashion, the words "ass" and a bunch of exclamation points. The latest updates gets an extra special section up top with a larger thumbnail and links to the 4 options you have for every set: High Quality Pictures, Screen Caps, Download Movie and Watch Movie, all of whicih will be described in detail later.

Clicking on one of the updates below (which, helpfully, are listed with the date of upload for easy catching up) brings you to that set's main page with links to the aforementioned options and 12 thumbnails so you can decide quickly if it's something you'd be interested in. Clicking on "Watch Movie" opens up the in-broswer Windows Media Player (there's no other option for file type here). The main problem with this feature is that you're essentially downloading the entire video before you can really watch any of it. It's a WMV and, therefore, must fully load before you can search it, so you're watching it in realtime. And each of these files is around 300-500MB so you'd better go make some popcorn. Or, better yet, just click the Download Movie button and check out the download page which offers far more options. Here you can download the movie in large sections or small sections of 1 minute a piece. Plus, you get the option of WMV or MPG formats. Then of course, there's the option to download the whole movie as a WMV- again, though, this file is massive so be prepared. More on the different video formats later.

The videos contain a good mixture of standard boy/girl, threesome (and moresome) material with a definite lean towards ass worship. Nary a video goes by when a girl isn't asked to shake the ass at the camera for a solid minute or two. Now, ass shaking isn't really my thing so this goes from slighly funny looking to boring in approximately 10 seconds. Since big asses aren't really my thing, I'll compare it to something I like: those vanilla on vanilla Oreos. So I guess the big ass shaking thing is to a big ass guy what shaking a bag of those awesome cookies is to me. Except I eventually get to eat the cookies and all the big ass man gets to do is masturbate to internet porn and cry himself to sleep. Sounds like I win that battle! Anyway, the content is all handheld, gonzo style stuff but the production quality is good enough- quality audio and not just "get on the bed and fuck" kind of stuff. There's actually a lot of talking to the models before, during and after the sex part which usually bores me, but it's usually at least somewhat entertaining in these. A lot of the girls they use (and they frequently use the same girls- there's one latina chick that pops up in nearly every other video) seem to be really into it and have fun personalities. So it's not all business. This is actually kind of surprising, considering this is content from the same guys who brought us the BangBus- content that is not only degrading and boring, but also at least partially to blame for the rash of "reality" porn that's popped up in the past few years. Oh yeah, you get access to that site with your membership as well. So if you want to pretend that random girls will have sex with you for money (possibly the saddest fantasy of all time), you can hit that up.

But I digress. The video formats, while not all that varied, at least come in different lengths so that even slow pokers can keep up. The big, full length WMV is a whopping 640x480 at a remarkable 1.04 MBps bitrate and looks pretty damn close to DVD quality- I even fullscreened it on my TV and got only a little bit of pixelization and digital artifacting, but it was well within tolerences. Again, though, these videos are about an hour each so the files are around 400MB a piece. Luckily, my download manager worked on this site so I could queue some up overnight and have them ready to go for a wake n' shake before work. The large WMV is also available in 14 minute and 1 minute segments, with an MPG version at 448x360 for each of those lengths as well. However, the MPG filesize is larger and there's considerably more digital artifacting present when you go to full screen, so I'd stick to the WMV unless you've got a serious Microsoft boycott going on or something.

The pictures for the sets aren't really anything to write home about. The "High Quality" images are usually just some posed shots from before the action, taken with a pocket-sized digital camera and outputted at about 800x500 resolution. They're prtty much useless. There are screen caps for each set as well, taken from the large WMV videos that look better than the posed shots because there isn't an on-camera flash making things look cheesy. These are good for seeing if there's something specific you're looking for in a set but there are a ton of these per set so they might take a while to sift through. Plus there are plenty of good thumbs on the download page that serve essentially the same purpose.

As mentioned in the preview, there are 12 other sites in the BangBros network, including BangBus, BallHoneys, Big Tits Round Asses and MILF Lessons to name a few. There are several sites on the network that aren't exactly in the update rotation anymore... Mom's Anal Adventure, for instance, hasn't been updated in over 2 years. But there's still a lot of bonus content on here- all pretty much in the "girl with big tits gets fucked and facialed" category.


Ass Parade is a pretty decent fetish site. There's some high quality content that caters specifically to the fetish and doesn't appear to be just a collection of stuff that happens to fit a fetish. I'm pretty impressed with most aspects of this site and, with weekly updates, it can only get better. If you're an ass man, I'd say this is a pretty good horse to bet on.


Image sample 1 from members areaImage sample 2 from members areaImage sample 3 from members areaImage sample 4 from members areaImage sample 5 from members area

Screenshots from Ass Parade

Members area screenshot from Ass Parade - click to enlarge

External Opinions

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Total average: 85/100 Our score: 85.0/100

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